(Today is Nelson Mandela Day in South Africa. This will be my contribution to one of Mary Nonkwelo’s “Share Your Story” Books – The Empowerment Network)

My most fortunate chance meeting with Nelson Mandela takes me back to late 1995 when I was preparing for my 3^rd visit to South Africa from Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. On the way out the door, I made a very bold statement to my wife Beverley and my two sons Ryan and Shane. It went something like this, “during this trip to South Africa I am going to personally meet Nelson Mandela!” Well, needless to say there was lots of laughter and comments like “are you dreaming?”, “get real dad”, “I know it’s great to be positive but it will take more than positive thinking!” At the airport one of my sons even said, “say hello to Nelson Mandela for us when you see him dad,” followed with laughter and smiles.

Three weeks later I’m packing my suitcase getting ready to head back to Canada after a great few weeks of speaking in Johannesburg, South Africa! At the last minute I realized I had forgotten to buy gifts and that most of the shops were closed on a Sunday. I hopped in my car and made my way to the Rosebank Rooftop Market that I heard would be open. Suddenly in the middle of Rosebank, the traffic began to queue and eventually came to a halt…obviously a car accident. People were out of their cars looking at something. I asked one of them, “is there an accident?” His answer was, “no…The President of South Africa, Nelson Mandela (Madiba) is out for his Sunday afternoon walk…that is stopping the traffic!”

Then I noticed to my right a wall of body guards giving President Mandela the privacy and room to walk. I pulled over and parked the car and quickly walked to the wall of body guards and took a deep breath and asked “can I meet President Mandela?” They answered “not today, he is just out for a leisurely stroll.”

Then from behind the wall of body guards came Nelson Mandela’s voice…“ask him if he is Canadian” (If I had of been an Australian at that time I think I would have said I was a Canadian! :-)) I said “yes” and he replied, “let him through.” Wow…the power of thought and the power of taking a chance and asking! (By the way Nelson Mandela is an honorary citizen of Canada.)

I stepped into his presence and he grasped my hand in the most sincere handshake fashion imaginable. He asked me my name and then proceeded to ask where I was from? I told him Nova Scotia…he then said, “what part of Nova Scotia?” I answered, a little community called Newport Station about 8 kilometres from a town called Windsor. He then said, “that’s in the Annapolis Valley.” I answered, “that’s correct.” He then proceeded to tell me that the Annapolis Valley is known for their apples and that in May each year the people of the Annapolis Valley have the Apple Blossom Festival. I was surprised how much he knew.

Then he asked me what my dad did for a living. I explained that he was a diesel mechanic for the Gypsum Open Pit Mining Company for 35 years. Then he asked about my mother. I explained that for many years she was a waitress in a local family restaurant. He then said, “Bill, you are from humble beginnings.” I answered with “I would have to agree that you are correct.”

From there he proceeded to ask if I had brothers or sisters. I explained I had one sister Sharon. He even asked about her children. He at one point looked at the ring on my finger and said; “you are married Bill…your wife’s name?” We then talked about Beverley, my wife and my two sons Shane and Ryan. We also talked about Vancouver, British Columbia where we resided.

Eventually he asked me what I was doing in South Africa. I explained that I was a speaker and trainer with a focus on entrepreneurship, marketing, sales and people development. He then said, “Bill we really need people like you in our country. You do not have to answer me right now, although I am going to ask you to please consider staying in our country and help us grow our people and our country.” We spoke for about 10 minutes and all the time we chatted he held my hand and looked squarely into my eyes. The only way I can describe it is…I had just had a rare experience of being with a man who was deeply rested in his being! I could feel the peace within Nelson Mandela. It was a spiritual experience. I was electrified.

How wonderful…he recognized the Canadian accent. He wasn’t political or all business…he wanted to know about me as a person, where I was from and information about my family. All of us could take a lesson from Nelson Mandela’s way of dealing with people. There is a saying that people will often forget the words we use but they will always remember how we made them feel. I felt special, I felt his sincerity, his humbleness and his caring yet powerful presence. I will never forget how he made me feel. Thank-you Madiba! 19 years later and I am still here in South Africa.

There is a message here not only for ourselves as individuals, also for our communities, countries, businesses and families. Try to remember…“people go where they are invited and stay where they are appreciated.” Nelson Mandela invited me to stay. Wow!

One other important life lesson I learned from Nelson Mandela is that we all like the feeling of status, an important position or role. The feeling of power is a great feeling. That is why we like to be empowered. Nelson Mandela is unique. When it came to the use of Power, Nelson Mandela also had it right. He was quoted saying after becoming President of South Africa, “The problem I have “is not” how to use power. My biggest problem is how “not” to use power.” Let me repeat what he said. He said, “The problem I have “is not” how to use power. My biggest problem is how “not” to use power.”

In his book Leading Like Madiba, (Leadership lessons from Nelson Mandela) Martin Kalungu-Banda got it right. He wrote:

• Where he could punish, he tried to understand the position of the one at fault
• He practised restraint, when he could have used power to settle scores with those who had treated him and his colleagues as if they did not matter
• When he was in such a strong position that he could push others to comply with him, he preferred to consult, persuade and even plead in order to settle matters

Instead of intimidating people with his power, he chose to bargain and quite often forgo the short term “sweet victory.”

If all those who are called or think of themselves as leaders, learnt how not to use power, our homes, our work places and our world could be friendlier, happier and even maybe more peaceful.

Martin Kalungu-Banda is correct with that statement. As a parent, government official, as a place of worship leader, as a supervisor, manager, teacher or boss and even as a spouse we could all follow Nelson Mandela’s example.

What are the seven lessons I learned from Nelson Mandela?

1. What you believe will or can happen…the power of positive thinking…backed up with action. I believed it could happen and it happened because when the opportunity appeared I moved to action. (Be courageous and ask.)

2. I learned that when I meet others, I need to stop talking about me and invest more time letting others talk about themselves.

3. Ask sincere questions, be focused, have eye contact and remember to help the other person feel good about him or herself…empower people.

4. Listen to understand others, including those close to me, rather than listening just to respond, advise, defend or sell my point of view.

5. It is nice to be important although it is more important for me to be nice. Kindness and sincerity makes a big difference in our lives and the lives of others.

6. If I have “The Power”, look for ways “not to use power” rather than looking for all the ways to use power.

7. People go where they are invited and stay where they are appreciated. 19 years later I am still here and only a few days ago my African grandson, David William Gibson was born here in Johannesburg, South Africa. I officially now have roots in South Africa as well as in Canada.

Madiba you will live on in my mind and heart forever. I am so grateful that I met you…such a giant of a man during one of my first visits to South Africa. What a privilege! We need more role models like Nelson Mandela in this world. You are and always will be a legend…you will live forever. I am blessed to have been influenced by you.

On August 17^th & 18^th, 2016 I am running a 2 day workshop in Johannesburg titled Turn Your Sales & Marketing Into Real Profits…In Any Economy http://billgibsonspeaker.com/turn_your_sales_and_marketing_into_real_profits_in_any_economy/

“If you have found this blog article to be valuable for you, I would be grateful if you “shared” it with your Social Media Networks. Also feel free to circulate it by e-mail or other means internally within your organization or externally to your clients, suppliers and personal and business network. Thank-you!”    – Bill Gibson

Bill Gibson is a Canadian who is living in South Africa. He is an international speaker and author and a developer of sales, service, marketing, collecting, employee morale building, personal development and entrepreneurial training programs and systems. His blog is www.bill-gibson.com and his website is www.kbitraining.com. He can be reached at bill@kbitraining.com or phone +27-11-784-1720 in South Africa. You can follow Bill Gibson on Twitter: @billgibson1, connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gibsonbill or Knowledge Brokers International SA Pty Ltd Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/knowledgebrokers?ref=hl

Research shows that only 4% of the population actually have written goals and the 4% who have written goals achieve them 95% of the time.

Believe it or not…goals can be so powerful they can actually help people delay dying by a brief period.

In China one group surveyed death patterns. They discovered that just before the Chinese Moon Festival there was a 35% drop in deaths and that immediately after there was a 34% increase in deaths. People briefly delayed dying until the festival was over.

In another survey with a specific religious sector of elderly people they discovered a 34% drop in deaths 1 week before a major annual religious holiday period and a 35% increase in deaths immediately after…the amazing power of goals.

Most people don’t have goals. They have wishful thinking. What is missing with wishful thinking is clarity of purpose, actions and time lines that get them there.

Goal setting is one of the most important habits and abilities that a business owner can have. According to Dr Lee Pulos, having a focus on a self-determined destiny or goal, is the one quality consistently found in people who are high achievers.

With goal setting it is important to make sure that your goals are achievable goals. If they are sales targets they should be achievable sales targets. Goals need to be attainable and realistic. One of the common reasons for depression is continually having goals that are unfulfilled.

According to Dr Lee Burke, children who grow up to be happy children are continually given goals by their parents, but they are achievable ones. Achievable goals create happier people. So, keep setting new but attainable goals and maybe some day you will laugh as often as a child. A child laughs on an average of 400 times a day, the average adult laughs 15 times a day.

Let’s look at how I can help you set and achieve your coming year’s goals so that you not only become a more prosperous business owner, salesperson or executive but also an even happier person.

To make it quick and simple for you I have simplified the process with 5 Steps.

Step 1: Choose Your Goal

The first key to success in any area of your life is to know what you want with no indecisiveness whatsoever. Once you really know what you want you have clarity of intent. The clearer your intent is, the greater the emotional desire is to obtain what it is that you want and the sooner you will experience it becoming a reality.

As a business owner, you will choose the areas that you want to achieve specific results in. Those areas could be:

• Increase our turnover or my sales from 2 million to 3 million
• Increase profits by 10%
• Open three new market areas this year
• Launch a small telemarketing division that will achieve 20% of our turnover
• Hire and develop a sales manager to take over the managing of the sales force
• Build a 6 month Cash Reserve for the business by December of next year.

In your personal life it could be goals for:

• Good health, energy and vitality
• Financial security for you and your family
• An enhanced spiritual life
• Mental and personal development
• An improved lifestyle

With any potential goal, ask yourself the question…do I have the time, energy, ability and desire to commit to this.

Start only those you want to achieve and the ones you know you will persevere forward with and enjoy the journey moment by moment because you probably will experience the long dry desert called The Dip before reaching your goal. Ask yourself, “in my heart do I really want this? Is this my goal or is it someone else’s goal and I think it is mine?” Be sure it is your goal!

Remember: “When The Mission Is Clear “Abundance” And “Know How” Will Appear”

For clarity your goals must be Smart Goals.

You also want to make sure your goals align with your personal values and personal beliefs. If the goals do not align you will continually sabotage your progress.

As an example of a goal let’s assume your specific goal is to hit 3 million in turnover this year. Now that you have chosen a goal we go to Step 2.

Step 2: Break Your Goal Down Into Smaller Goals

There is the old saying, “How Do You Eat An Elephant?” The answer “One Bite At A Time”.

To achieve any goal you must break the goal down into smaller digestible bites or into smaller chunks or more narrow time frames.

For Example:  you now break your 3 million goal down into sub goals.

• Your goal is to generate

• 600,000.00 in the first quarter
• 700,000.00 in the second quarter
• 800,000.00 in the third quarter
• 900,000.00 in the fourth quarter

In the first quarter you break your goal down to:

January      150,000.00

February     200,000.00

March         250,000.00

Total           600,000.00

You then do the same for the second, third and fourth quarters. By breaking the big goal down into smaller chunks, you began to see how it is possible and reasonable to attain the goal.

Step 3: Action Plan

At this point you put together an action plan broken down into monthly, weekly and daily activities to achieve the smaller goals that will eventually lead you to achieving the overall goal.

To simplify an explanation of an action plan, we will utilise the previous example. Let’s say your average sale is 5,000 and you have three sales people.

• It takes five client “face to face” meetings to close one deal
• That means the following:

• In month one your team needs to see 150 clients to close 30 sales at 5,000 per sale.
• In January they only have 15 working days.
• You decide you need two of your salespeople to see 3 clients per day and one salesperson has to see 4 clients per day. This will give you your 30 sales for the month of January.

The key here is you have your team moving to action daily with specific activities.

Action is vital. Motion creates emotion that in turn creates more motion or more action. I think Abraham Lincoln summed it up well with this statement: “Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.” Move to action…you and your team do not want the “leftovers.” Remember, planning is great although “Action Creates Clarity!”

Step 4: Set Up A Measurement System

“What gets measured, gets managed, and what gets managed, gets done.” You need to have a system that measures your progress. In other words “Keep Score” so you can pat yourself and your team on the back for how far you have come. You can also see whether or not you are ahead or behind in the activities needed to reach your goal. By having measurements you receive a feeling of achievement when you accomplish the task or are ahead of schedule. It gives you short time measurement targets to reach for. You can also see if you are lagging behind. That awareness can then stimulate you to increase your actions, adjust them or change them. Measurements in the example would be measuring the activities, the number of sales and the average sale size. Put up a “results and measurement board” so the team can see it. Track it by the day.

Step 5: Rewards

Have celebrations and rewards along the way to reward yourself and your people for a job well done.

Additional Tips

Add these additional tips and you are well on your way to achieving your goals for the coming year.

• Be clear about your motivation. Make a list of why you want to achieve the goal. The why is what really motivates?
• Interview people who have achieved a similar goal and gather stories and articles about how different people have done it.  You need “models of possibility” directly (face to face) and indirectly (stories and articles).
• Draw a picture or create a collage of photographs of what your goal is, or “how you will feel” or “what you may receive” when you reach your goal. Make up a screen saver with your goal on it.
• Develop some self-talk statements or affirmations that support your goal.
• Set up some type of measurement system and have rewards at certain points of accomplishment.
• Make them visible, carry them with you and review them regularly.

May you have health, wealth and happiness in the coming year! 

In February I will be conducting 2 Day Intensive Workshops on Making “Real” Marketing and Selling “Really Pay.” The workshops will be held in Durban, Cape Town and Johannesburg. For more information go to the following link: http://www.entrepreneur.co.za/how-to-make-real-marketing-really-pay-2-day-event/ or contact our office directly. Our office contact details are below.

Also, if you have found this blog article to be valuable for you, I would be grateful if you “shared” it with your Social Media Networks. Also feel free to circulate it by e-mail or other means internally within your organization or externally to your clients, suppliers and personal and business network.

Bill Gibson is a Canadian who is living in South Africa. He is an international speaker and author and a developer of sales, service, marketing, collecting, employee morale building, personal development and entrepreneurial training programs and systems. His blog is www.bill-gibson.com and his website is www.kbitraining.com. He can be reached at bill@kbitraining.com or phone +27-11-784-1720 in South Africa. You can follow Bill Gibson on Twitter: @billgibson1, connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gibsonbill or Knowledge Brokers International SA Pty Ltd Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/knowledgebrokers?ref=hl

“You don’t get what you deserve in life…you get what you negotiate.”

Many gurus of negotiation often make this powerful opening statement and, while there are merits to what they say, why not try this statement on for size: “You don’t get what you deserve in life, you get no more or no less than what you believe you deserve, at the time you negotiate…”

Negotiating is a way of life and lack of self-worth is one of the main reasons we continually fall short of our expectations in life. A strong sense of self-worth is one of the main reasons why we prosper in life. If you feel worthy and deserving you have a tendency to open yourself to receive the abundancy and opportunities available to you in life. (The world is my oyster). If you feel unworthy or undeserving you have a tendency to take less than your share in life. (Beggars cannot be choosers).

Your perceived self-worth will influence whether you choose the high road or choose the low road in life. Your sense of self-worth tends to influence whether you choose to learn easy lessons or difficult ones. Do you dance through life or struggle through life, choose good role models or poor role models, develop good life-building habits or choose self-sabotaging habits? Do you get into healthy, productive relationships or end up in destructive, energy draining ones? Are you materially, emotionally and spiritually wealthy, or poor?

As we treat ourselves with more respect, other people tend to do the same. They can subconsciously ascertain how we perceive ourselves through our facial expressions, body language, tone of voice, dialogue other subtle cues and behaviours. “We teach others how to treat us,” the saying goes. Our perceived self-worth is a big part of that teaching.

People are often upset and disappointed with the money or exchange they receive for their services. This often happens because they are not clear in their own mind what their services are worth. They hope that other people will see their value and give them what they deserve. When you know what your time, energy, knowledge and services are worth and you believe it, others will tend to honour and value what you are offering as well.

It is important to understand that money represents an exchange of energy between you and the outside world. It represents the energy going out from you and the energy coming back in. Your energy is a major factor in determining whether or not money flows freely and harmoniously to you. If you do not value your time, energy and ability you cut off your flow of energy and, in turn, cut off abundancy.

If you constantly cut your fees and prices and accept less than what your services are worth, you cut off your flow of energy and money in two ways. First, the resentment or bad feelings, even if it is only slight, will stop money coming back to you because resentment and bad feelings push money and energy away. Secondly, you are giving the signal to your subconscious that your services or work is not worth very much. The subconscious begins to believe it and gives off signals that it is so, and the inflow of energy (opportunities and money) declines. It becomes a downward spiral.

When you honour your value and worth, energy and money move toward you. Because of this, a perceived high self-worth or a perceived fair value for your services and products must be understood and believed before entering into negotiation with other parties. Otherwise, the odds are you will come away from the negotiation with less than what you really deserve. You literally set yourself up for failure.

Remember, you are already worthy. Your worth already exists as a fact of life. You just need to discover it. In actuality, the present state of your relationships, work, finances, education and life style is a good indication of your perceived worth.

When negotiating it is important to always “negotiate from strength”. Before going into a negotiation be sure to enter the negotiations believing you deserve the right outcome. That is negotiating from strength. If you are negotiating for a percentage of a company in order to build your perceived value, make a list of why your experience, your money, your contacts and your knowledge are worth what you are asking. Daydream about it, add more points, leave it alone, come back again, add more reasons and do this until you are really sold on your own views, on yourself or your situation.

As an entrepreneur, you can use the same approach whenever you are raising capital or borrowing money. I’ve done it many times in my Entrepreneurial life. Virtually every time I managed to borrow or raise the amount of money I needed. Why? It was because of the inherent belief in myself and the business, to the point that others bought into my belief during the negotiation. Remember, focusing on all the things you did wrong in life, why you do not deserve the best, what is wrong about right now and how things never work out for you, drains your energy.

If you focus on what is right about you and your life situation right now, it gives you the energy to overcome the past, present and future challenges and hurdles that you must correct now, or face in the future. Positive energy equals abundancy.

Your self-worthiness makes a big difference in negotiating the outcome you want. Invest time, energy, brainpower and money, honouring your value and worth.  

“When you honour your value and worth,

energy and money move toward you”

 “Your perceived self-worth will influence

whether you choose the high road or choose

the low road in life”

“When you know what your time,

energy, knowledge and services are

worth and you believe it, others will

tend to honour and value what you

are offering as well”

“If you have found this blog article to be valuable for you, I would be grateful if you “shared” it with your Social Media Networks. Also feel free to circulate it by e-mail or other means internally within your organization or externally to your clients, suppliers and personal and business network. Thank-you!”    – Bill Gibson

Bill Gibson is a Canadian who is living in South Africa. He is an international speaker and author and a developer of sales, service, marketing, collecting, employee morale building, personal development and entrepreneurial training programs and systems. His blog is www.bill-gibson.com and his website is www.kbitraining.com. He can be reached at bill@kbitraining.com or phone +27-11-784-1720 in South Africa. You can follow Bill Gibson on Twitter: @billgibson1, connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gibsonbill or Knowledge Brokers International SA Pty Ltd Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/knowledgebrokers?ref=hl